Control
by faburizu
Summary: Terra, a temporary resident of Titans Tower, feels uncharacteristically drawn to the team's darkest member - and decides to act upon it. Slight yuri.


**Control**

She'd been going over the idea in her head. Sometimes, it seemed ingenious. At others, foolish. Who was she to ask such things of people she hardly knew? Though she didn't quite act it, she was terribly grateful that she had a place to stay. She loved nature, truly; however nothing could substitute that feeling of belonging one experienced when part of something collective. She'd been so adjusted to being a loner, an independent soul, that she forgot how much she missed being around other people. As comforting as it was, she knew not to get too attached. To never get attached. That was exactly how a good thing turned into a mistake.

In a way, she felt guilty. The green one was drawn to her. Somehow, he expressed an unusual interest in her. It certainly wasn't something she was used to, and naturally she wasn't sure how to react at first. She'd considered this in her mind carefully, and decided to play along. It wasn't every day that something like this happened to her. Even though she knew she was going to end up leaving, just disappear one day, she figured it would at least make him happy for a little while. And to tell the truth, she didn't mind the attention all that much.

Slouched against the sofa, Terra instinctively flicked through the channels of the television. It had been at least a year since she sat in front of one of these and still, nothing was on. Her mind drifted to that idea again. Her less careful side chimed in. This whole thing was only temporary. She never planned on staying, so what did it matter what she did? It didn't. Unconsciously, she began chewing on her pinky fingernail. She could just be making this into an unnecessarily big deal. It wasn't like her to worry so much. Clicking off the television and rising from the couch, she decided to just do it already. This could be her only chance to actually relate to someone.

She knocked on the dark grey door in front of her, and half-expected for it go unanswered. To her delight, the door slid open just a crack. Raven's dark eyes peered through. She did not speak.

"Hey, Raven, can I come in?"

"What for?" she asked.

"Oh, uh, I was just wondering if we could… y'know, talk."

The dark girl was silent for a few moments before admitting a response. "Fine." The door slid open the rest of the way, allowing the girl to slip past Raven into the equally dark room. "What do you want?"

Terra pressed down on Raven's bed before taking a seat on the edge of it. It felt soft. She could tell that Raven wasn't one for small talk, and so she decided to get to her point, and quick. "Um. Y'see.. what I wanted to talk to about is…" she sighed. "I'm not like the rest of you."

Raven, who sat with crossed arms next to Terra performed a gesture suspiciously close to rolling her eyes. "Yeah," she responded. "We know. You don't have a home. You don't have a family. You're a real charity case."

The blonde swallowed. "That's not what I meant." Ignoring the other girl's insult, she continued. "I'm talking about my powers." She put her hands in her lap and played with her fingers, avoiding eye-contact with Raven. "I have a problem."

There was a pause. Raven shifted uncomfortably. Becoming annoyed, she said, "Fine, I'll bite. What's your problem? And why are you coming to me about this? Don't you have Beast Boy?" She spoke his name with contempt.

"Because I feel like you'd understand this."

"Humor me. What would I understand?" she asked.

"Have you ever... lost control?" she looked up and allowed her eyes to meet Raven's. She was truly curious of the response.

Raven uncrossed her arms and furrowed her brow. "What makes you think that?"

"With all due respect, you're a powerful girl. It's just something I feel. I'm skilled at noticing the details in things. And your details tell me that sometimes, you're not entirely sure how hard an attack will hit, and you're sometimes afraid of how your emotions will impact yourself and the people you care about, physically."

The lavender-haired girl narrowed her eyes. "You don't know anything about me. You don't know what you're talking about." She stood, glaring at the blonde. "Is this what you came in here to do? To show me oh-how-much you know about my past? Well, you're wrong. You are completely wrong."

"No! That isn't what I meant." She stood as well waving her arms in front of her. "It was just an assumption. And if I'm wrong, then I am sorry. But that's what I am going though. That's what I came here to discuss with you. Even if none of that stuff is true, I still know you're the one who can help me."

"I can't help you. Coming to me was a mistake," Raven stated.

Terra sighed, dejected. "Raven, why don't you like me? Ever since you guys found me, and invited me to stay here, you've been the distant one. You haven't made the slightest attempt to get to know me. You brush me off so easily. I've seen the daggers you stare."

Raven half-laughed, beginning to pace her room. "You want to know why I don't like you? I don't trust you. You come in here, and parade around like you've been living here for years. You're arrogant in the sense that you think you know everything about everyone. We didn't discuss whether or not you could stay here. This wasn't a group decision. And if it was, I would have voted against it." She stopped pacing and looked at Terra.

Looking down, Terra stayed silent, taking in Raven's explanation. She thought for a few moments before delivering a reply. "You think I'm so different from you. Do you think I get accepted like this all of the time? I'm not meant to be around people. I'm an individualist. To be honest, it sounds like nothing more than petty jealousy. But look at me. Look at me Raven, and tell me if I'm really something to be jealous of. I live alone. I can't control the intensities of my powers. I'm not close to anyone. In fact, I never even planned on staying here. I'm going to leave, and soon. Unexpected and unannounced, one day you're all going to wake up and I'm going to be gone. And everything will go back to how it's always been. This isn't a plea for attention, and I expect no one's sympathy. When you look at the big picture, you're really the fortunate one here. You have a home, a team of friends who care about you so much. I'm a drifter. I'll be out of your hair soon enough." She paused for a moment, to take a breath. She searched the pale one's eyes for a sign of understanding. She decided she wasn't finished yet. "I don't know what it is about you, Raven. I don't know your past and you're right- I hardly know anything about you. Yet for some outlandish reason, I feel like I trust you."

The two girls stood in silence for what seemed like infinity. Terra, as sure of herself as she'd ever be, leaned forward and in a swift movement grabbed the sides of Raven's face and kissed the mysterious girl. She didn't know why, and she certainly hadn't planned on it happening. Terra was impulsive, and often took chances in unanticipated situations. As she carried out this spontaneous act, she felt her upper body and shoulders overcome with a warm-hot power. Before she could process it in her mind, she was thrown across the room. As her back hit the wall on the opposite side of the room, she slid to the floor. She stared across the room at Raven, whose cheeks tinged red and stared wide-eyed at the blonde.

She wasn't sure what did it, the climatic explanation or the spur-of-the-moment kiss, but she felt a barrier dissipate between herself and the other girl.

"All right," said Raven. She spoke softly, and the dislike was absent from her tone. "I don't know if I can do much… but I will try and see what I can do to help you." Her cheeks were still red, and she took a deep breath. Her voice was almost quivering, as she said, "Just… don't do that again."


End file.
